Fear

It was my junior year of high school when I decided I wasn't going to let fear stop me from having fun. So many times I wanted to do things--everything from dating to joining a club--but I didn't because I was afraid. I was so shy and I was so worried about looking stupid and not fitting in. So I did nothing. What a waste it was.

In my junior year I was tired of being alone. I had acquaintances, but no real close friends in high school. It wasn't until the summer before my junior year that I felt enough was enough. When school started I joined every club I could--Ghost Towners, Skating, and Wrestlerettes. I socialized even though it was literally painful for me to do it. I'm hearing impaired so social situations have always been hard for me. Having to wear hearing aids made my life easier in some ways, but way harder in other ways. I've always felt I was an outsider, never fitting in because I was different.

I went to meetings, I talked to people and, yes, I became a cheerleader for the wrestling team. lol For an extremely shy person like myself that was the hardest thing I have ever done. We had to perform in front of people. In front of teenagers. Ughhh. I would get physically ill beforehand. But I made myself do it. I was also around guys more and I really tried to get over my fears of interacting with them, but it was hard. I could talk to them, but I did more daydreaming about relationships than actually having any.

In my junior year, I had a major crush on one particular boy--John. He was so handsome, so intelligent; he was on the wrestling and football team. He was always sweet to me if we interacted. But I let my shyness stop me from trying to get to know him better. He was out of my league. Man, if I only knew then what I know now. :)

In my senior year, I would go to soccer games to watch a guy who I thought was really cute. I kept to myself, until one game I met another girl doing the same thing I was--watching the guys play. We starting talking and once we realized we weren't panting over the same guy we became friends. Ellen was one year behind me in high school, but light-years ahead of me with her confidence.

I was still on my kick to face my fears, sometimes succeeding (I went on a date with a classmate) and sometimes failing (never went to any school dances, not even the prom). I drug poor Ellen to the movies with me--I was afraid of horror movies so I was determined to make myself watch them. (She walked out of a movie that had something to do with the devil). I joined her in the lobby soon after. Yes, I chickened out.

Ellen was and is good for me. Yes, after all these years we are still best friends and even live in the same town. She double-dog dared me so many times and made me do things. Of course, I double-dog dared her, too. She NEVER backed down from a dare. What did I expect from a natural redhead of an Episcopalian minister? We did some wild things that only we know about.

We haven't even told our husbands about most of the escapades we experienced. I know a few had to have been slightly illegal. lol Our Virginia City saloon gal photos was one of our trips. I alway had and have fun with Ellen. And I won't mention anything about Lake Tahoe, her parent's condo and some vodka. To this day, I still can't drink Screwdrivers.

I wish I would have met her sooner in high school. My high school years would have been more memorable than they were.

Face those fears, people. Even if they scare the hell out of you, it's worth facing them. Too bad we don't get do-overs.

That One Teacher You Most Remember

If you could point a finger to that one teacher in your life that made a difference, could you come up with a name? Did you have a person who opened your eyes to a subject that you never even knew you loved? That person for me was my high school history teacher, Mr. Fred Horlacher.

Even 30 years later, I can still close my eyes and remember what it was like to be in his classroom. I loved it. And I wasn't alone. I had him for Nevada History in 11th grade and it was my favorite class ever. He truly brought history to life for his students. He made us love history. He breathed it. He lived it. He was what history should be about.

Going to the gym to register for classes was always a challenge. But it was especially a challenge for Mr. Horlacher's classes. The line in front of his table was the longest by far. No other teacher compared. We fought to get into his room. Every chair was taken and students never cut or dropped out of his class. Ever. Students even scheduled doctor's appointments around his lectures. We just didn't want to miss them. They were that good.

For one thing, Mr. Horlacher never used a school book. All of his classes were lecture only. We had to take notes. He tested off his notes. He was the coolest teacher ever. You couldn't help but learn in his classes. He would walk into the room as the character he would lecture about. One day it might be a Civil War soldier. Another week, it would be a Native American. He would be fully decked out with an Indian headdress and clothing. He was that person from history. He gave us facts, dates, lives, loves, the good and the bad. History wasn't dusty, distant stories, but living, breathing people and the challenges they faced.

I hated when the bell rang and his class was over. His classes were never long enough. What was even cooler about Mr. Horlacher is he had a history club that he was the faculty advisor--Ghost Towners Nevada History Club. It was the most popular club to be a part of--it was only open to juniors and seniors.

I'm not sure, but I have a feeling that my school's history club was unique. I don't know of too many high schools that boasted a history club that had so many members. We not only had fun together as a group, but we learned so much about Nevada history.



Our initiation into the group was on Halloween night. We went up to Virginia City, Nevada to its cemetery. We walked through the cemetery at midnight. Mr. Horlacher had it booby trapped with tape recorders, senior students dressed up (glowing red eyes and all) and made sure we screamed a few times. After we walked through the cemetery, we sat among the graves in the dark and he told us about the spooky true history of Virginia City. It was absolutely one of the coolest things I've ever done.

And we had many wonderful adventures with Mr. Horlacher. We walked the actual trail that the Donner Party walked, at night, with only moonlight to show the way. We munched on beef jerky as he told the story of the Donner Party, painting the picture of the hardships they faced on their journey.

Not only were you learning about history, but we were on the same path, stood by the same trees that they camped under. It wasn't until he got to the part about the possible cannibalism, that the beef jerky sort of lost its flavor. That was Mr. Horlacher's warped sense of humor, which we high school students absolutely loved.

We went on so many field trips. One of them included camping by the reservoir and going "snipe" hunting. Some of us knew better, but we kept our mouths shut as other students took potato sacks and sticks and went to capture the snipes.

We went into gold mines, restored pioneer grave headstones, and visited ghost towns. He made it all come to life for us. He taught for so many years at my high school, finally retiring. He is an outstanding historian who still educates young and old alike in the Reno/Sparks area with living history demonstrations.

Mr. Horlacher is one of the reasons one that one of my majors in college was history. He taught me that history is a living, breathing subject that is never meant to be forgotten.

He is and was an amazing teacher. He embodies what teachers should be about--honorable, memorable and kind. Kudos to you, Mr. Horlacher. You are the best!


If one could make alive again for other people some cobwebbed skein of old dead intrigues and breathe breath and character into dead names and stiff portraits. That is history to me! ~George Macaulay Trevelyan